Mirroring Through Text

Posted: May 16, 2010 in Mentalism

So we’ve discussed how you can mirror someone in person to build rapport with them allowing them to feel more comfortable around you. But what happens when you’ve exchanged numbers and gone your separate ways? Can you continue to mirror someone through texting on a mobile phone or talking to someone over the phone to continually ensure that they’ll feel comfortable speaking to you?

The answer is yes, yes you can. I’ve recently discovered this by trial and error, I came across mirroring through text accidentally. I was texting someone I haven’t really spoken to before and decided to see what would happen if I copied the smilies they used, particular words they used and the number of kisses they put after each text. I set out to try and mirror each text that they sent, and I found that after just a very short while, they were willing to tell me information about themselves which they probably wouldn’t have told me, had they felt uncomfortable talking to me. So next time you’re texting someone, try using the same smilies they use, and similar wording to build rapport.

Talking on the phone is very similar, but you can build rapport on a more deeper, conversational level. When you’re talking to someone on the phone then usually you’re able to hear them breathing, try matching their breathing by consciously breathing in and out the same time that they do. When we’re talking to a friend face to face we’re subconsciously mirroring their body language movements, breathing patterns and speech tones. So if they’re talking over the phone in a soft, quiet voice, then you should do the same.

Doing this will allow someone to feel far more comfortable talking to you, and mirroring is a great way to build rapport, and indeed, help friendship flourish.

  1. Paul says:

    You could say you are moving on from mirroring and are now using their way of communincation with themselves. Actually getting into their world and speaking their language at an unconscious level.
    If you think that when we read emails and texts we ususaully read them in our own voice. So when we read the words we use the sender and the reciever are connecting at a deep level.
    I must add if you do this with a negative intention you will be caught out!!

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